Hi (:
My name is Chair and I rock.
Seventeen candles on the 28th September '09. I ♥ cocktails, cocaine, and clubbing.

PARAMORE
is the bomb.
you know you love me
xoxo


put a more detailed profile here. (:




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Posts at 11/11/2006 07:57:00 PM

Awwww.... this reminds me of SOMEthing... harhar.. posted by joyce on friendster.








(memories.. haha!)

Want to have laughs?? haha basahin nyo toh pinost din yan sa friendster.

EVER WONDER where we are headed ...

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens ourskin?
Why women can't put on mascara with theirmouth closed?
Why you don't ever see the headline:"Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why "abbreviated" is such a long word?
Why Doctors call what they do a "practice"?
Why you have to click on "Start" to stopWindows 98?
Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, whiledishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?Why the man who invests all your money is calleda "Broker"?
Why there isn't mouse-flavored cat food?

Who actually tastes dog food when it has a "new& improved" flavor?
Why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?
Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Why they don't make the whole plane out of thematerial used for the indestructible black box?Why sheep don't shrink when it rains?
Why they are called apartments when they areall stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress theopposite of progress?
Why they call the airport "the terminal" if flying isso safe?

AND...In case you need further proof that the human raceis doomed because of stupidity, here are someactual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a Myer hairdryer:"Do not use while sleeping".
(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work onmy hair).

On a bag of Chips:You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside.(The shoplifter special?)

On a bar of Palmolive soap:"Directions: Use like regular soap".
(And that would be how???)

On some frozen dinners:"Serving suggestion:
Defrost".(But, it's just a suggestion).

On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert(printed on bottom):
"Do not turn upside down".(Well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating".(And you thought????...)

On packaging for a K-Mart iron:"Do not iron clothes on body".
(But wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate
machinery aftertaking this medication".(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of
construction accidents if we could just get those 5year olds with head colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid:"Warning: May cause drowsiness".
(And...I'm taking this because???)

On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only".(As opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor:"Not to be used for the other use".
(Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm abit curious.)

On Nobby's peanuts:"Warning: contains nuts".
(Talk about a news flash!)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts".
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

I don't blame the company, I blame the parents forthis one:
On a child's superman costume:"Wearing of this garment does not enable you tofly".
Now that you've smiled at least once,

it's your turnto spread the stupidity!!!